Oh my! FREEDOM is back.. except for

Truck payments.

I have so much catching up to do so IF this ever gets to court I can fight for whats right..

Saturday June 4th Jerry drove me all over the high desert searching for a pick up... we both feel I will be safer in a big truck.. so there is now a 04 RAM in my life.. NO frills just transpo but dam glad to be back on wheels....

The summer is here the last few days have had triple digits here and there..

let me post a photo and go about watering trees.. I got the Palms watered this morning and fed 1/2 of them.. watering on the last section of the west side pines.. they need feeding I am just getting up enough grit to walk among the snakes (maybe snakes) to feed them.. worrying about my cat he seems to not feel well and I haven't seen him all day.. We have flys this spring/summer -need more hens.

Happy Memorial Day..God Bless our Troops

Morning Kids,



Got my USA Flag flying .... Got the horses fed, hen and cat.....



Got H20 on the west pines... all is going pretty smooth so far..



Got my mail from Florida..



Need to try and type up the miscellaneous pieces of paper depicting my days since the wreck..



So far the lawyer has done nothing, but I suppose if I try to get a new one this one will bill me a bunch of $$.. The only help I have had has been my smart son using his brain and computer to search every nook and cranny trying to help me.. Sandi who for the last 2 months has driven me to work...



Looking forward to a day of racing, Indy and then NASCAR....



Oh so many scraps of paper with notes.. just going to start a few blogs and add these notes or they will never get done if I try to organize them .. They basically are just what happened on that day.. how I felt..



Like Friday 5 /28 night the knee was popping so I guess it is not well yet and this AM I had a tuff headache.. I notice headaches as I have never really suffered from them..

Boy, that was a scary moment, I thought I had lost this blog post.. so got it now and will shut down, need to go change the water to more pines

C and I JULY 4 2003

This is a photo of ME Consider Me at 2 years old and myself taken by Lucilla July 4th 2003

Just another bit .... a mess like my 'now' life

I'll just type these as I pick up the scraps of paper I have written on...





THURSDAY MAY 20,





I just arrived home from work.. closing the door and screaming inside myself " I want my life back"..





I can feel that Sandi is tired of my moaning (bitching) and grey mood every day on our long ride to work and the long ride home...





I can not afford to stop working.. I need to get a car I can trust to be able to make the drive to the base safely.. I am miles from stores 25 miles to Barstow and 66 miles to Victorville and the doctors that are NOW in my like..








FRIDAY May 21





Sandi finds another car 'for sale' in the Main PX parking lot.. it is a 1999 Plymouth Breeze with 149 k miles will call on it.. It seems a bit better than the 79 Ford pick up... A person needs a good vehicle for this desert area.. Summer heat of 12o* and winter down to 10*...





SATURDAY MAY 22





No headache or leg cramps YET..





It is too difficult to use bold and color to make a point as they are hard for me to get them off and go back to regular type..





Today the shoer is coming to do trims on the last 4 of my horses... It is very windy..


I will get the horses wormed too... OH, I know his young helper is trying to help but you need to handle Arabians different than cold bloods.. OH, I should have just done it myself..





So we get the 3 mares done while Raynebow is 'horsin' and move over to my stallion.. I didn't realize the young guy had walked over first and had C out.. I have a special way of handling him and wanted the rules followed.. but not to be... Bill the head shoer has bad knees and is the best I have ever seen in his profession.. he works real quite and steady and gives the animals a feeling of every thing is OK.. I usually hold "C" but with the brace I didn't .. these are large 1000 lb animals no matter how clam they are they can get scared and knock you over if you can not move fast enough.. By now I am crying, and decide to give "C" the wormer myself and he promptly spits it out.. He is the one I wanted wormed the most as stress has him loosing weight.. I can not take him out to the round pen or large paddock..






SUNDAY MAY 23..




TEARS... I have been good about not crying tears.... although I am verbally crying the blues all the time till I have to not contact people(even my kids) cause I am such a complainer.. I know I am on the way to old age but I resent being pushed into it by the now referred to as 'bitch'.





Saturday May 15



The hot wire is shorted, I can not find the short and have walked(dragging my braced leg) all over the 5 AC twice.. so it must be on the outside line where I usually drive the pick up so I can alert the snakes I am coming.. but WAITE NO PICK UP anymore... more headaches,, used to say "I don't get headaches, I give them" but has life changed..





Sunday May 16..



Couldn't sleep, congested, morning headache..




Thursday May 20



CHP finally returned my calls, left me with a complete feeling of doom.. I think I thought they were my last chance and now that is gone too.. She didn't have insurance when she hit me but now she does her Company has taken her back.. yes she will get a ticket for running the stop sign and driving without insurance, I guess... seems like a 'fix it' ticket to me... yep, she has turned my life into hell and gets a slap in the wrist...





So I call ch 7 looking to Rick Romero, he no longer helps the helpless..



OH WHAT A SCARE, after typing on this 1 1/2 hours I thought I'd lost it



just a couple more notes in general...



you young folk with healthy functioning bodies won't understand how as you age your body dies a little at a time, your young firm skin wrinkles and everyone see that but you are wrinkling inside too.. so now long car trips are designed as to where the next bathroom is located.. day by day functions, let me see how far will I be away from a rest room in case my bowels want to move.. well, now I have to consider other people , those who are stuck driving me about.. to me no one should have to announce I need the rest room NOW.. If you have your own car you just drive there..



I work behind a barber chair and have for the past 15 years turned that chair with my left knee to be able to keep my hands on the client.. not anymore, that leg is in a brace... I can not drive a manuel transmission, nor ride my horses and handle the stallion.. did I mention I live on 5 acres that I love.. who do you think cared for all this.. two legged ME can you read the anger.. I have been rushed into old age when I didn't feel old at all.... BEFORE

seems this brace is hurting the V Vein from child birth on my left leg and doing a bit of trouble on the right leg for its doing all the work...

better post before I loose this

Warm weather and dangerous critters

May 18, 2010, Tuesday:

Today I would be going to work but now with no transportation I have this day off till Sandi and I go back Wednesday.. My once convenient work schedule had to be rearranged so I can work.. Big story on this also, will address in later posts..

Jerry is driving the 100 + miles to take me around for feed, food and any other chore I need to do .. Then he will drive the 100+ miles back home and we will have added 100 miles while he is here..The feed store is 30 miles one way, then the bank and grocery stores and misc. stops... it all adds up..

So it is a cool windy day, probably too cool and windy for the diamond backs and side winders... I think the scorpions will be warm and cozy in the hay under rain traps so you can see why I can not feed in the early morning dark or the evening dark.. I live in the country/desert not on sidewalks, we co-exists with the desert wildlife..

OK, I need to gear up with the brace and go out to feed and water the stock.. It is a big walk 265' to the stallions pad then 50' to his hay stack and back to feed him, now cross the property to the mare paddocks this is a walk of about 200' to their hay stack and the first feeder, now 85' south to the next feeder and then back to get another flake for the last mare about a 170' trip to her feeder and 70' on to her water... I then can walk across the 150' stretch to turn the water on for the south east tree line about 50 trees, let this run about an hour . Now it is time to turn off the tree water so it is now just 500' feet in a straight trip.. This is just the morning horse feeding and tree watering.. there are still the hens to feed and plenty more trees to water all over this ranch.. This place is a labor of love and what had kept me strong and healthy.. body and soul..

Eddie B. RIP

On our way to town

What she did to my truck and I am the same now, bent and ruined

May 16 Sunday afternoon

So the last blog only took 4 hours to get online..

As I came back and forth to add or correct things sometimes the corrections didn't go through..

As in one paragraph it should read 'sheet plywood'

So at this rate if the case takes a few years to get to court ( that is if it has to go to court) my blog should be ready..

I will try and start on my day by day reports on my next time off to get caught up

I tried to post a photo with this blog and no luck.. know how as I have a photo on my other blog..